Perfect Family-An Indian Perspective

What is a perfect family?

Am proud to be one of the female genders because my purpose is not limited, I have to fight with this world every moment and it makes me stronger. So yeah I am a girl and I am feeling great about it. To pursue my career, to choose the field which I want to, to make a presentation on my period, to get equally paid, to wear a short skirt, to marry when I want to, to be financially independent are just a few out of many things a girl has to achieve with so many hindrances caused by the people around her. Even then she achieves it and that is what makes this gender very special. So why does society feel sorry when two girl children are born in a family. They need not celebrate it but why are the parents considered unlucky. Wouldn’t this affect the mind-set of the children? Can anyone say which family is lucky and why? Can only a boy child be the pride of the family? Will the family not be perfect if there is no son? If so, this world would exist only with males only and be a place of pride and honour. But as you all are very well aware, that is not the case.

A family with two daughters is also a perfect family. Daughters are not lesser in anyway than sons

The reproductive system is the only difference

So a family becomes unlucky or the family doesn’t have an inherent when they have two daughters. There are incidents where the father doesn’t even carry the baby or even take a look at the baby and some start crying when it turns out that the second child is also a girl. So now the scenario is, the relatives start feeling sorry for the family and consider the parents to be unlucky. Why can't they be lucky or why can't they be perfect? Is it because there are two pretty and talented young girls who are going to change the world someday or is it because they are going to be the bravest and strongest women the world has ever seen. What makes the family not perfect or what makes the daughters lesser than any men out there. The only difference between these two genders is their reproductive systems. Can Masculinity and femininity alone define how a person should lead his or her life?

The only difference between genders are their reproductive systems and that cannot judge the capability of the genders


Mind-set of the girl children

This kind of behaviour affects the mentality of the children. They start feeling low and some start feeling that only a boy child can be of honour to the family.  Imagine a child knowing that her father did not carry her or take a look at her when she was born just because she was a girl and he was upset about that. How can they fight with the outside world for equality knowing that their own parents were once upset to have two girl children?

Upset daughter because the parents are feeling unlucky to have two daughters

 

Expensive social image

The thought that having a girl child will increase the expenses, is a very old one but it continues to be there despite many of us talking about feminism. If this is the case, then just think of all those barriers faced by those two daughters in the family not being able to go out and achieve their goals and open their wings to fly only because of that single thought that taking care of a girl child is expensive. When I say expensive, why these thoughts arise is because of the practices which the society insists. Dowry to be paid for the daughter is what the parents are concerned of. They prioritize saving money for their daughter's wedding rather than spending money for the daughters to be empowered, to have a bright future.

Marriage to protect the social image of the parents. Parents ready to spend money for their daughters wedding amd give dowry but not what their daughter wants to do

Yes, it is expensive to spend for their daughter's wedding and also dowry is expensive and yes it is expensive to satisfy the society and to spend money for another family. It is expensive when, as parents, they don’t want to break the stereotype and educate their daughters and empower them and also it is expensive because whatever the parents are trying to spend for their daughter is not what their daughters want, it is just the expense which the parents have incurred to protect their social image.




Daughters can be inherent

A perfect family cannot be determined by the number of daughters they have. To the person who is reading this, a perfect family need not have a male child. Daughters take care of their parents at their old age, daughters run a successful family business, they are being the pride of the family, they take responsibilities, they can be the inherent as well. No, daughters are not expecting dowry or wealth or to get married to a rich guy, what your daughters or your cousins or your sisters want is to love them, and accept that a girl is not lesser in any way, because that is true and you need to start accepting it. Equality is not something that provides justice to the female gender because they are suppressed instead equality is something that brings out the true potential of females and it brings out the truth that not even one quality of a woman can prove that she is lesser than a male. 

A women can rule the world. She can be successful empower her and educate her because she deserves it


No gender is lesser in anyway

To the people reading this article, If any women is dependent on you and she has went through something similar make sure that her desires and dreams are not hindered just because there were two daughters in the family. Economic condition cannot be a reason for limiting their daughters' dreams. The Realization that to enjoy and celebrate the birth of two daughters takes nothing but just the realization that no girl is lesser in anyway than a boy and that's true. This kind of realization makes this world a better place to live in.

Gender equality is spoken not just because women need justice but because it is true that both the genders are equal in all aspects and lesser than the other

Family Quotes - 

"Every family is perfect with just one daughter or two daughters or both son and a daughter or even two sons."

"Regretting or feeling unlucky to have two daughters is the last thing our society needs."


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4 Comments

  1. I had to scan 'way past the midpoint to discover whether this was India Indian or Native American Indian. The sentiment expressed therein is contradicted by the ruling party of India, I’m afraid, as well as the resurrection of the caste system, where female Brahmins are substantially more fortunate.

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    1. This, as clearly pointed out, is an Indian perspective not the Native American Indian. So, yeah, by saying, “the sentiment expressed is contradicted by the ruling party of India”, what sentiment do you say? and then the caste system, the female Brahmins are not that fortunate in all the parts of the country. It varied from place to place and time to time. Few decades or centuries it was in a way and the next following decades or centuries, it was in totally a different way. Also to remember, it varied from place to place all over the Indian Sub-continent. So, we in general, cannot generalize the whole point scenario. Here in this article, we focused on the recent decades. Also, yes, women goddess’ were treated with respect, pride and all. And yet, sometimes, only by looking at the expenses, they feel that the girl child is unlucky for them. But few also believe that Goddess laxmi (goddess of wealth) is born, when a girl child is born to them. And few believe that now that the girl child is gone, all their wealth goes away as they have to give dowry and make arrangements for her marriage. So, it all varies according to the time period. Now the situations are mixed. In few families it is as the way described in the article and it is different in few families.

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    2. I had to scan for the information before reading because the matter was NOT clear. And real women never got goddess treatment, either, and killing off female babies was normal while the fundamentalists in BJP membership still adhere to the belief in murdering female babies–they’re fundamentalists, after all. India abandoned the old ways for a time but that was until the rise of the BJP, which turned back the clock.

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    3. You were right, we should have put in more information to make things more clearer. Anyway, the information we provided for your earlier comment as a reply has answered all your queries we feel.

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